Thursday 19 March 2015

The children wrote some wonderful short stories after our EOTC Week, here a few of them!

Trains by Andrew

I drove to Lional’s trains and we had lunch there. I was on the train and the girls screamed in the tunnel. I dipped my feet in the freezing water. The water wheel had a big bucket. I played with a decoy duck. I had fun!

Trains  by Niko

I tipped my feet into the pond and it was very cold. There was a very dark tunnel. I ate my sandwiches then I lined up to go on the trains and the girls screamed when we got to the dark tunnel. I saw two dogs, one dog was biting a rock and one was climbing the other one. I went on the trains ten times. I went on the flying fox it was very fast and scary. There were lots of wasps!

Kings  by Luke

I went in a car to the King’s house.I zoomed down the water slide and splashed into the pond. I swung on the rope and I jumped off it. I swung in the pond and dived down into the cold water!

Lake Day by Tahlia Curtin

Last Friday I went on a biscuit and we went over massive waves and it was fun! It was a very hot day and I felt very sweaty and there were lots of wasps. You could go on a jet boat that was really fun!


  1. Great use of interesting verbs and adjectives. Well done. I hear that you are all working so hard in Room 7. I'm looking forward to reading more stories soon :-)
    From Mrs Kitto

  2. Hi Andrew,
    We really like that you wrote 6 sentences. It was great how you described the 'freezing water' and the 'decoy duck'.

    Challenge: Could you try starting some of the sentences in a different way - not just I?
    We can't wait to see your next piece of writing.

    From Waka Stride

  3. HI NIKO
    It's Lexie from Waka Stride. I love your writing and what i like about it is the describing words and how you said the girls were screaming in the dark tunnel .Maybe next time you could tell me a bit more why you all did it about trains.
    From Lexie

  4. Dear Luke
    I like that looks like you have worked so hard . I couldn't do that by myself.
    I think you can try doing it with so many i's to begin the sentences.

    by holly and ella.

  5. Dear Tahlia, I really like your writing.
    Your challenge is to not add and so often.
    It looks like you worked so hard.
    from holly

  6. Hi Tahlia I like how you described things in your story like how you were sweaty
    From Hannah