The children wrote some wonderful short stories after our EOTC Week, here a few of them!
Trains by Andrew
I drove to Lional’s trains and we had lunch there. I was on the train and the girls screamed in the tunnel. I dipped my feet in the freezing water. The water wheel had a big bucket. I played with a decoy duck. I had fun!
Trains by Niko
I tipped my feet into the pond and it was very cold. There was a very dark tunnel. I ate my sandwiches then I lined up to go on the trains and the girls screamed when we got to the dark tunnel. I saw two dogs, one dog was biting a rock and one was climbing the other one. I went on the trains ten times. I went on the flying fox it was very fast and scary. There were lots of wasps!
Kings by Luke
I went in a car to the King’s house.I zoomed down the water slide and splashed into the pond. I swung on the rope and I jumped off it. I swung in the pond and dived down into the cold water!
Lake Day by Tahlia Curtin
Last Friday I went on a biscuit and we went over massive waves and it was fun! It was a very hot day and I felt very sweaty and there were lots of wasps. You could go on a jet boat that was really fun!
Great use of interesting verbs and adjectives. Well done. I hear that you are all working so hard in Room 7. I'm looking forward to reading more stories soon :-)ReplyDelete
From Mrs Kitto
We really like that you wrote 6 sentences. It was great how you described the 'freezing water' and the 'decoy duck'.
Challenge: Could you try starting some of the sentences in a different way - not just I?
We can't wait to see your next piece of writing.
From Waka Stride
It's Lexie from Waka Stride. I love your writing and what i like about it is the describing words and how you said the girls were screaming in the dark tunnel .Maybe next time you could tell me a bit more why you all did it about trains.
I like that looks like you have worked so hard . I couldn't do that by myself.
I think you can try doing it with so many i's to begin the sentences.
by holly and ella.
Dear Tahlia, I really like your writing.ReplyDelete
Your challenge is to not add and so often.
It looks like you worked so hard.
Hi Tahlia I like how you described things in your story like how you were sweatyReplyDelete